Song: I've been afraid of changing cuz I built my life around you

Another scribble of last night's dream:

"Am in some sort of restaurant/bar type of place waiting in line for the bathroom. All of a sudden I see the new girl from work. She says she has to tell me something. Tells me that she is my half sister. I am in total shock and faint. Later it’s explained to me that before my mom married my dad she had my half sister with some other guy. Weird considering what I know about my mom and knowing she’s not like that. Haha strange. In other part of dream, I had written in my journal that I was a huge fan of Jung Woo Sung (I know this is definitely from watching “Musa”). Later I get a call on my celly from him saying that he’s in the States and that he’s actually in Jersey! (What the hell?!) Anyways he had read my journal and saw that I really liked him and he was wondering if I wanted to meet up with him and take some pictures. And I think that was it."

2:35PM

Fuck I'm pissed! I should have expected it. I don't know why every year I set myself up for it when I KNOW it's gonna happen. Something always has to go wrong on my birthday. It's just really inconsiderate that people don't set aside enough time or effort to be there. Am I being vague? I just don't feel like going into details now. I'm just so sick and tired of things going wrong for my birthday. Maybe it's just me and that my expectations are too high. Maybe I was wrong in thinking that my birthday actually means something to my friends too. Or maybe I'm just overreacting. I don't know. But honestly, this still doesn't stop me from expecting a great birthday every single year. And also I want to say thank you to those people who have helped make the planning easier and have been considerate enough to call and let me know what's going on with their schedules (even though most of them don't read this anyways). It's my fucken birthday. They should be calling me, not the other way around. Fuck that. Apologies if I'm coming off really bitchy here. *taking deep breath* Ok I'm not gonna let this get to me and I'm gonna have fun tonight. I feel better now that I had a chance to bitch and vent. =)

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