Song: Me give my heart to a woman? Not for nothin', never happen, I'll be forever mackin'

Aww man!! I feel bad! Peter asked if he can bring this guy to my birthday. But if he comes, his girlfriend comes too. And if I invite them I should invite Peter's brother and his girlfriend cuz said friend of Peter is Peter's brother's girlfriend's brother. Confused yet? But anyways I don't have a problem with them coming. In fact I have a lot of fun with them. But I nearly have 20 people attending already and I don't want a huge huge crowd. I'm worried that my separate friends will only chill within their own "group". I DO NOT want to have to talk to each "group" separately throughout the whole night. Funny thing is that Alba asked if he can bring someone right after that convo I had with Peter. But to Alba I said yes cuz it was only one person. And I made him promise me that he would mingle with everyone. Anyways I'm sorry again Peter!

Phew I think I may be stressing a bit too much about this birthday dinner. I am such a perfectionist and have such high expectations when it comes to my birthday, that everything needs to go well. No matter how much I think about it, I still can't figure out why I put so much emphasis on my birthday and why it is SO important to me.

I have been addicted to the RBJ boards lately. I'm on it all day at work! I'm happy to have found such a great online Asian community. So what are you waiting for? Join!

So back to my birthday for a minute....I've compiled a birthday wishlist of sorts. It's not your typical what-kind-of-presents-does-Key-want list. Just things that I would like to accomplish as I grow one year older. Since this is my year anyways, what better time than this to improve myself?

I wish to....

• learn to be more understanding. For someone who is so open minded, I can get pretty short sighted at times and dismiss other people's views too easily.

• control my temper. The wrong words can burst out of my mouth before I have a chance to think. The tongue is a sharp and hurtful weapon, much more than we realize.

• smile more. When I was younger I was always told that I was constantly smiling. As I grow older, I think I've been doing that less and less. I don't want the burdens of life to bring me down and change my cheerful outlook on life.

• say thank you more. To show the people I love that I see and appreciate everything they do, no matter how small it may seem.

• quell my spiteful heart. I can be mean at times and even if it's not voiced all the time, I still have my mean thoughts.

• continue to always be honest with myself and everyone around me. I am proud of posessing that quality and hope to keep it always.

• never stop writing.

• do things, not just talk about them.

• be a better daughter. To see my parents as human beings with feelings like mine.

• be a better older sister to be able to guide, strengthen and support my brother whenever he may need it.

• stay the strong emotionally centered person that I am but also to never forget to be compassionate.

It's a pretty impressive list to adhere to but I have confidence in me. *wink*

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